"Life is full of misery, loneliness, and suffering - and it's all over much too soon."

"I feel that life is divided into the horrible and the miserable. That's the two categories. The horrible are like, I don't know, terminal cases, you know, and blind people, crippled. I don't know how they get through life. It's amazing to me. And the miserable is everyone else. So you should be thankful that you're miserable, because that's very lucky, to be miserable."

"My one regret in life is that I am not someone else."

"If you want to make God laugh, tell him about your plans."

"Life doesn't imitate art, it imitates bad television."

"I don't know the question, but sex is definitely the answer."

"Sex without love is a meaningless experience, but as far as meaningless experiences go its pretty damn good."

"To love is to suffer. To avoid suffering one must not love. But then one suffers from not loving. Therefore, to love is to suffer; not to love is to suffer; to suffer is to suffer. To be happy is to love. To be happy, then, is to suffer, but suffering makes one unhappy. Therefore, to be happy one must love or love to suffer or suffer from too much happiness."