"No dumb bastard ever won a war by going out and dying for his country. He won it by making some other dumb bastard die for his country."

"Yeah, the whole family knows. It's no big deal. One night at dinner I said, 'Mom, you know the forbidden love that Spock has for Kirk? Well, me too.' It was easier for her to understand that way."

"The problem with winter sports is that -- follow me closely here -- they generally take place in winter."

"When someone leaves you, apart from missing them, apart from the fact that the whole little world you've created together collapses, and that everything you see or do reminds you of them, the worst is the thought that they tried you out and, in the end, the whole sum of parts adds up to you got stamped REJECT by the one you love. How can you not be left with the personal confidence of a passed over British Rail sandwich?"

"Ah, well,ʺ said Abe, idly studying his fingertips. ʺI have it on good authority thereʹs going to be a new ‘gateʹ opening up soon over on the south side of the wall."The truth dawned on me. ʺOh lord. Youʹre the one whoʹs been doling out C4.ʺʺYou make it sound so easy,ʺ he said with a frown. ʺThat stuffʹs hard to get a hold of."

"I don't know what I was expecting a vampire's room to look like. Maybe lots of black, a bunch of books by Camus... oh, and a sensitive portrait of the only human the vamp ever loved, who had no doubt died of something beautiful and tragic, thus dooming the vamp to an eternity of moping and sighing dramatically.What can I say? I read a lot of books."

"See?” I’d whispered to Bones, nudging him with a grin. “He never argues with her. Isn’t that sweet?”A snort preceded his response. “Keep dreaming, pet."

"Procrastination is not the problem. It is the solution. It is the universe's way of saying stop, slow down, you move too fast. Listen to the music. Whoa whoa, listen to the music. Because music makes the people come together, it makes the bourgeois and the rebel. So come on people now, smile on your brother, everybody try to love one another. Because what the world needs now is love, sweet love. And I know that love is a battlefield, but boogie on reggae woman because you're gonna make it after all. So celebrate good times, come on. I've gotta stop I've gotta come to my senses, I've been out riding fences for so long... oops I did it again... um... What I'm trying to say is, if you leave tonight and you don't remember anything else that I've said, leave here and remember this: Procrastinate now, don't put it off."

"Garcia wondered why people with JESUS stickers on their bumper always drove twenty miles per hour under the speed limit. If God was my co-pilot, he thought, I'd be doing a hundred and twenty."

"The reports of my death are greatly exaggerated."

"I was talking aloud to myself. A habit of the old: they choose the wisest person present to speak to"

"No wonder kids grow up crazy. A cat's cradle is nothing but a bunch of X's between somebody's hands, and little kids look and look and look at all those X's . . ." "And?" "No damn cat, and no damn cradle."

"So far Kat has been through all the Wa's she could think of, but Hale hadn't admitted to being Walter or Ward or Washington. He'd firmly denied both Warren and Waverly. Watson had prompted him to do a very bad Sherlock Holmes impersonation throughout a good portion of a train ride to Edinburgh, Scotland. And Wayne seemed so wrong she hadn't even tried.Hale was Hale. And not knowing what the W's stood for had become a constant reminder to Kat that, in life, there are some things that can be given but never stolen.Of course, that didn't stop her from trying."

"Claire, did I invite you to my barbeque?" Massie asked, her neck tilting to the right and her arms tightly crossed."Huh? No. I mean, I don't know," Claire said." Massie said through her teeth."

"Most men don't seem to get that telling a pissed-off woman to calm down is like throwing gunpowder on a fire.” ~ Liberty Jones"

"Oh, of course," said Ron, clapping a hand to his forehead. "I forgot we'll be hunting down Voldemort in a mobile library."

"I don't care what is written about me so long as it isn't true."

"What are you talking about?" Narcissus demanded. "I am amazing. Everyone knows this.""Amazing at pure suck," Leo said. "If I was as suck as you, I'd drown myself. Oh wait, you already did that."

"Now what state do you live in?''Denial."

"There's a hell of a distance between wise-cracking and wit. Wit has truth in it; wise-cracking is simply calisthenics with words.", Summer 1956]"

"No one believes a liar. Even when she's telling the truth."

"Do you know the difference between education and experience? Education is when you read the fine print"